Thank You for Your Sacrifice

Today I had the opportunity to represent MOPS at a pre-deployment event for the families of some of our service men and women. It was an all-day event where the men and women and their families were informed of everything they would need to know before they deployed, covering subjects like how get get your will and finances in order to the high rate of suicide (NOTE: in the Army alone soldiers are committing suicide at the rate of one per day). For seven hours I watched these families cling to each other, react to the information they were receiving, and try to process what the future may hold. The Army had several vendors there to offer aid to the soldiers and the families members that would be on their own, and MOPS was one of those.

MOPS motto this past year has been No Mom Alone, and this event opened my eyes to a group of moms that are very alone. I watched those women specifically look scared and unsure and determined and strong. I just wanted to invite all of them for dinner and take their children so they could go shopping by themselves or out to coffee with their girlfriends. But realistically, that was 140 family units...that's just not possible.

I know we hear a lot about how to be grateful for our soldiers and the sacrifice they make and how to send them care packages. I don't want to deter people from doing that, but remember for every service man or woman that is deployed there is at least one family member at home that is sacrificing as well! Mike doesn't travel much, but when he is gone I have a new perspective on what it would be like to be a single mom and it is hard. But to be a single mom for six months, nine months, twelve months at a time?? And add to the stress not being able to talk to your spouse at a moments notice or to be wondering if they are safe, knowing they are in harms way...it is over-whelming just thinking about it.

So here is my challenge to myself and to you...

1. pray for the soldiers and their families

2. ask God to show you how you can help and be an encouragement

3. keep your eyes open for a family to "adopt"

Athena Hall, Area Developer for MOPS International is a military mom. Their family has been through one deployment and is about to go through another. In July/August 2010 issue of MomSense, Athena outlines how to help a mom during a deployment. Here are her suggestions:

1. Prepare and deliver a meal

2. Watch the children for a few hours every month or every week

3. Schedule a girl's night out with her

4. Don't complain about your husband to her

5. Invite them to share holidays with you...even the little ones like Halloween and 4th of July

6. Mow the lawn

7. Remember deployment lasts a long time...don't just be there in the first month

8. When he returns, celebrate and still be a friend.

Athena says it a much better and more humorous way...you really should read the whole article and read more about her and her family!

I have a renew sense of awe and compassion for these families today. I pray that I still do in a week, a month, a year. I want today to change my attitude, not just effect me for a moment.

Thank you to our soldiers. And THANK YOU to their families for the sacrifice that you have made as well!

Hospitality

We are home from a crazy trip to see my parents in Texas. And by we, I mean my wonderful husband, my six sweet children, and my fantastic mother-in-law - all together in the car for 4500 miles and 18 days! See, crazy trip!

Believe it or not we all arrived home still liking each other and all saying we had a great time and would do it again...in 5 years...when we had time to forget how much we disliked being in the van for that long listening to small children declare they were "starving" and needed something picked up from the floor and constantly listening to Disney movies!

I found myself being very introspective on this trip. It could be that I was reading the new book for this MOPS year, Momology. It could be that we were visiting my family that we hadn't seen in three years. Or it could be that there was so much social interactions going on that I needed to retreat some. Whatever the reason was, I was focused more on the root of each activity, each relationship, each individual. It was really quite fascinating! And while I won't bore you with all of my thoughts, there was one theme that really stood out - hospitality.

We stayed with several people, met people for meals, and met people for activities. I noticed that each group of people welcomed us differently. I love this quote from Emilee Barnes, "Hospitality is so much more than entertaining - so much more than menus and decorating and putting on a show. It means setting aside time for planned fellowship." We had such wonderful fellowship with so many people! Fellowship - that perfectly defines what we enjoyed about this vacation.

Whether it was our time in the van (sometimes too much fellowship), time when my parents and all my siblings were together in place at the same time, time when we were reconnecting with friends, time when we were relaxing, time when we were learning a new skill, time when we were meeting new people, or even time when we were in hotels - it was ALL hospitality!

Each time of fellowship was different and it made me rethink how I do hospitality. Do I welcome others in a way that makes them feel welcome? Do I set aside time to fellowship with them or do I spend time being busy? Have I prepared (even for the uninvited guest) so that people feel important?

The difference in each time of fellowship also made me realize that there is no one "right way" to practice hospitality. While some invite people into their homes other celebrate that fellowship at a restaurant. While some people let kids play in the house, other create play spaces outside, and others suggest activities that aren't at their home so that the kids feel welcome too. God wants us to do what he created us to do, to use the talents he has given us, to share His love.

There are several times of hospitality that stand out in my mind.

We visited one family that lives in a sizable house and had beds for almost all of our family to sleep in. The had yummy meals planned, and we had great conversation while the kids played. It wasn't the size of their house, or the type of food we ate that made it so enjoyable. It was the conversation and the depth of the conversation. We cut through the "hows the weather?" to topics like "what happens when you don't trust your pastor?" or "how unique God made each of our kids". The atmosphere was relaxed and everyone pitched in to cook and clean - even the kids.

We visited another family and just relaxed. The kids swam or played with legos or were really loud and created a band. The parents reminisced about years ago and played games. Food was made, the kitchen was cleaned, laundry was even done. It was as if we were family.

We got to see all of my siblings at a casual restaurant - Joe's Crab Shack. The kind where the kids don't have to be silent and where you use your fingers to eat. My parent's hospitality was creating that opportunity and paying for the meal. They wanted the family time and they knew we needed to eat. It was a fun time and great memories.

When we arrived home, one friend had broken into our house and left us dinner on the counter, milk and eggs in the refrigerator and fruit in the fruit bowl. Then knew we had a need and they made our transition from vacation to "back home" welcoming.

All different experiences - all wonderful fellowship.

"May its doors be open to those in need, and its rooms be filled with kindness. May joy shine from its windows. And His presence never leave it." --Jewish home blessing

Five Conversations You Must Have with your Daughter

I have wanted lead a moms group for pre-teen moms for a while, and do Vicky Courtney's 5 Conversations study. But I have procrastinated in getting going. So, if it is something you would be interested in participating in, leave a comment and let me know. Meanwhile I'm trying to win a free study over @ LifeWay's Women All Access.

Soccer, Part 2

Up next, Judson's game. Judson started as goalie and did awesome!! His team has only had one practice and they were a bit rusty. Judson stopped four attempts in the first 10 minutes. He finally gave up a goal and then two more quick ones. He was getting quite discouraged, but considering he was defending a goal with three offensive players coming at him and no defenders nearby, I say he did pretty good. His team mates even look a little scared of his kicks! Most of his goal kicks went at least to the center line, some even past!But there were times when this was Judson too. Ah well, we will make him run some laps!

My Brothers Visit

My brothers, Josh & Jon came to visit us for almost two weeks. It was neat to be able to spend some time with them. We did several things, but unfortunately I misplaced my camera several days. This is what I did get documented!

We took them out to the ranch one day so they could experience the "big sky" and fresh air.

Josh got to open a gate...and get caught on some barbed wire. Morgan loves spending time on the tractor with grandpa.

Okay, both girls like to be on the tractor!

Jeffrey tests my patience daily. While this is not the best picture of him, it is one of his many faces. This one I will call the shrek face - lol.

Josh learned to ride the motorcycle and shot some clay pigeons - actually caught the edge of one.

Jon tried the shot gun as well. He decided it was too heavy and too loud. He said his favorite part of the visit was riding the 4-wheelers.

That is Jarrett's favorite part too.

Meredith even got to try a solo run this time. She did awesome and mommy held her breathe the whole time.

The whole gang. Our family, Josh and Jon, and Mikalah's friend Malia.

We also checked on the cows. It is calving season and there were lots of babies - this one was less than six hours old!

I have so much sympathy for this momma!!!

And we checked on the horses.

And fixed a tractor.

And played with the dogs. I think Morgan would love to live out here!

A day of fun!!!

So, missing my camera for a few days, we skip ahead to Easter.

Josh helped filled eggs for the great hunt.

Jarrett's goofy look.

This girly just doesn't take bad pictures.

Dying eggs is such a fun tradition. And thankfully our kids like eating the hard boiled eggs, cuz neither Mike nor I can stand them!! Jon said he didn't remember ever dying eggs. So he dyed one - I couldn't talk him into any more. Must not have been that much fun for a 22 year old!

My girls...I love them all...

And then I lost my camera again. I think it needs a permanent home!

Radom Thoughts...

I have neglected blogging...enough said.

The sun is shining, the snow is melting, and my kids are riding bikes outside...I am so ready for spring! But being the pessimist that I am, I woke up this morning thinking, "It is the first of March and beautiful outside...great, the end of March when I have to travel will be awful!"

You know it is going to be a trying day when before you even get out of bed your four-year old is already saying, "N-O...NO!" to being asked to get off your bed.

I finally used the last of the q-tips today...good thing I am going back to Costco tomorrow!

I have gotten serious about losing my baby weight (that would be from the children that are now almost 4 & 5). I restart my seriousness almost weekly. But this time I'm really serious! I'm using www.sparkpeople.com - cool site with lots of tips and a great community! And it is more about being healthy than losing weight.

I am addicted to www.thepioneerwoman.com She has great recipes - most of which don't fit well with the previous paragraph.

I have 78 weeks until I send my last sweet and wonderful child to kindergarten. It will be a sad day. What? you doubt my sadness? The tears are already flowing...really!

The library and I still do not have a good relationship. Last week, I was brave. I took five of my children to pick out books. I searched high and low for one particular book. The computers for searching are down. There is no "card catalog" like we had when I was younger with the yellowed cards that everyone and their germs had touched. And the librarians had their usually, "why are you bothering me again" look on their faces. Jeffrey had to go to the bathroom, Morgan had to go to the bathroom, Jarrett just wanted to play on the computer, Meredith wanted to check out chapter books, Morgan wanted CareBears books (located in the TV show themed books section - not alphabetized or organized in any fashion), Mikalah disappeared into the teen pit, and Jarrett only wanted non-fiction books about animals...any animals. After 45 min I was done. We went to check out at the main desk (remember the computers are down) and my children did not want to stand in line. They were all over the place - too close to the people in front of us, too close to the metal detector (not sure that is what it is, but it beeps loudly if you try to walk out with a book that has not been checked out...we know...from experience). Finally Morgan just sat on the ground. I asked her to get up. She responded that she didn't feel good and then promptly threw up all over herself and the floor. I figure we don't have to show our faces there again for at least another six months!

Why must my children run through the house? Do they not have a "walk" setting?

The Talk

Based on some of the responses I got from my last post, I am going to be brave and ask a question...

In the next two weeks I am talking to a MOPS group about sex. (Insert scream here!) So here is my question...if you were attending what information would you like to hear?

I will be sharing the hour that I have to talk with a doctor. I get to talk first and the doctor is supposed to talk about the physical aspects of sex.

So, any suggestions???